Every year my church hosted a singles retreat in Destin, Florida on Labor Day weekend.It was the first year I went, and even though it was for singles, I was dating someone at the time, a man previously married. My boyfriend and I spent time together, but we weren’t inseparable like you might think.But in a day when so much nominalism passes for authentic maturity, give us a few simple marks of spiritual growth that a man or woman should be looking for in a potential spouse.I think what you are looking for is seriousness about growth in the person’s faith.Our Lord's questioners responded by asking why Moses commanded that one give his wife a bill or certificate of divorce.Jesus made it very clear that Moses never commanded divorce; he permitted it because of the hardness of men's hearts (Matthew 19:7-8). In a sinful, fallen, world, divorce is a pragmatic way of dealing with broken relationships.
Divorce, Jesus said, was never commanded, but only permitted.
I know that sounds harsh, but let me explain my theory on Christian dating. But I do believe that if you are seeking God’s will about who you date, He will lead you to someone that is a true fit for you.
I don’t mean that your future spouse will be perfect or that you will think alike or always agree on everything. But I do believe that if you seek God’s guidance, He will lead you to the person who is going to be the match for you.
Because what I have tragically found is that Christian singles hit an area of desperation, particularly young women, and they will go: “Yeah, he is a Christian, he comes to church.” And really what they’re saying is this guy comes to church a couple of times a month, but outside of attending a service, he doesn’t have a real seriousness about growing in his understanding of the Lord, growing in his understanding of the Bible, being a prayerful person, no vivication or mortification that can be spotted, and no one who really knows them enough to speak to the growth in their character.
Now practically speaking, this means singles are seeking out people to speak into their lives.